i was about to sleep last night when my friend msged me. i din want to read the msg, but i was afraid that it mite be something important, so i read the msg.
this was the msg that made me sleepless! it was the very msg that caused my horrible dark eye bags to appear. it has also caused one of my eye to be swollen.
"eh, you not in 30/06 already, you are in 07/06" it was just this simple and short msg.
it brought lots of reflections and thoughts into my head. i tried swallowing my tears, but to no avail. it was dark at night. tears gushed out uncontrollably. only my brother was in my room at that time. i tried to cry silently, but its difficult, so i pretended to be suffering from a running nose. used quite some tissue to dry my tears and blow my nose.
went back to bed after my emotions stabilised. laid in bed and tried to sleep. kept my eyes shut very tightly, but i cant sleep. i just could not sleep. wanted to wake up to study, but wasn't in the mood. could not concentrate even if i studied. many many things were running, jogging, sprinting through my mind. a lot of things. the wonderful memories i had in 30/06. the fears of facing a completely new class. the difficulties ahead. the misery of missing my friends and teachers from 30/06. the deeply remorseful joan regretted deeply. "why why why? why did i not study harder?" haiz.. but its all too late. no time for regrets le. move on ba! and that's what i am gonna do!
joan jiayou! =)
gonna try and sleep well tonight with this mindset!
